June 2014

Man laying in a hospital bed with an arm cast looking up at the ceiling while a nurse watches him
Winning Entry!

Uh oh, she's moving the newspaper...think unsexy thoughts...unsexy, unsexy, unsexy... - Michael Smoker

Captions

I'm a quality management kind of guy, but in this case I'm not against lowering the bar.

Submitted by orme on Mon, 06/02/2014 - 11:57

You want me to do WHAT with that bar?

Submitted by mjcurfma on Wed, 06/04/2014 - 15:33

Oh, thank heaven!

Submitted by afleehea on Wed, 06/04/2014 - 15:39

Is that an engagement ring? Darn it.

Submitted by smkeller on Wed, 06/04/2014 - 16:27

Hmm - no, I don't think I need the newspaper; I have a beadpan instead.

Submitted by jizukac on Wed, 06/04/2014 - 16:30

Yeah, that enema isn't happening today.

Submitted by pnallen on Wed, 06/04/2014 - 20:08

Uh oh, she's moving the newspaper...think unsexy thoughts...unsexy, unsexy, unsexy...

Submitted by msmoker on Wed, 06/04/2014 - 20:12

Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven?

Submitted by rkhansen on Wed, 06/04/2014 - 21:27

Nurse, I must ask a rather unusual request. Please don't be alarmed, but if you would be so kind to slowly take this newspaper and kill that grotesquely large and hairy arachnid on the ceiling for me...

Submitted by mk26 on Thu, 06/05/2014 - 08:10

You know when I woke up this morning, I thought today seemed like a great day to have a beautiful nurse give me an enema - dreams do come true!

Submitted by trkelley on Thu, 06/05/2014 - 09:59

"Nurse? If I said I saw a monster crawling on the ceiling, would you think I was crazy?"

"Yes. Why?"

"Never mind. I'm ready to be discharged. Right now."

Submitted by jampmars on Thu, 06/05/2014 - 13:05

When I look up, I see a sign from God that I will limbo again some day.

Submitted by jthazer on Sun, 06/08/2014 - 06:55

So then he sez, "howsabout I break your arm to match your leg, squealer?" an' I sez, "you an' what army, fathead?" an' I turn to skeedaddle, forgettin' all about my leg...

 

Submitted by raull on Sun, 06/22/2014 - 10:58