“When the Administration says, ‘No smoking!’ they mean it!” - Lyna Gunderson

“Listen you four...quit cracking jokes. A 3-credit course on ‘Head Lice in Western Civilization’ is serious business.” - John Hazer

Early adopters of Title IX lacked much understanding as to the law's intent. - Andy Smith

…and I created this out of used bulletins and scrap paper! - Melanie Curfman

Colgate's, "Squeak from the bottom." toothpaste line was the industry's first attempt at recyclable packaging. - Kristi Palmer.

My love for you doth grow, like the flowers from thy head. But dear, forsake the mulch, ere the King may think thee dead. - Bill Orme

So I says to her, ‘Gertrude, you aren't keepin me from carvin' teeth with the guys, no mam, not this time.’ - Kristi Palmer

“Two bits, four bits, six bits, a dollar;  one more girl to break the bone in my collar!” - Robert Aull

"A jackhammer? For the School of Dentistry groundbreaking? Of course you realize, in fifty years we are going to be the subject of some wisecracking photo captioning contest!" - Scott Strickler

As you can see from this map, we have WAY MORE parking spaces than we will ever need. - Andy Smith